nice flow and meter. My only complaint is more on style than structure. Since ficly’s page width forces a wrap around of each line, I suggest line feeds after each comma; it would give it a more ‘traditional’ poetic feel. Also, Welcome to Ficly!
nice flow and meter. My only complaint is more on style than structure. Since ficly’s page width forces a wrap around of each line, I suggest line feeds after each comma; it would give it a more ‘traditional’ poetic feel.
Also, Welcome to Ficly!
Krulltar