Why the $%^& are Jedward so god damn popular?!? They irritate the hell out of everyone I’ve ever talked to! They performed the theme tune to GHOSTBUSTERS!!! And don’t even get me started on Louis “It’s-a-singing-contest-for-your-guys, but-for-my-group-you-should-rate-on-the similarity-of-their-hair” Walsh! How can he back these morons?!?

I will now proceed down a different path of proving them to be evil. Has anyone else noticed that around about the time they were born, cancer got really bad? I’m just saying. And what is up with their hair? I deduce that it’s the result of what they did when they went back in time to start vesuvius erupting and destroyed Pompei. Bin Laden dissapeared a few years before they appeared, and cannot be found, therefore, I put it to you, Osama Bin Laden is hiding inside one of them, the other is occupied by Sadame Hussein. But now, they’ve died down with the coming of Barrack Obama, and are now plotting to assassinate him, because they don’t like black people.

Think about it.