Jack’s a dimwit;
Jack’s a dunce
Should’a been smooshed,
Like those other runts.

Though Jack was brave
And self reliant,
His mom’s much tougher
Than a giant.

She cut him up,
She knocked him down
She called him a no-good,
Lazy clown.

And since that day
He’s lost his looks
He has trouble
Filling li’l black books

One golden egg’s left;
I’m afraid
Like Jack, no more eggs
Will e’er get laid

His dissipation
Wracked his ruin
No gamboling now;
There’s trouble brewin’

For soon he’ll starve.
Mate, say a prayer
For hapless Jack,
Ex-Giant-Slayer!

Burma Shave