Two months. Two months ago she had written to them. And now they had written back. The exact date that she got the letter—November 29th—-was etched in her mind as The Day That Changed Her Life.

She called her husband, the neighbors, her long forgotten aunts, uncles, and cousins and proudly told them her news. She was going to be a contestant on Treadmills to Bucks.

The show, a gaudy piece of daytime programming was a game show which only accepted chronic heart patients. The contestant was placed on a moving treadmill and had to keep jogging all while keeping up a steady banter with the host. Every few minutes, the victim (excuse me, contestant) had to answer a bonus question worth 500$. If they answered incorrectly, money was deducted from their winnings and the treadmill was sped up.

The show always ended with the contestant being carried out on a stretcher to pre-recorded applause.

Despite this, Nancy Kilomore had never felt luckier.