After spending half the night in the park drinking wine, and peeling back peddles on the flower I decided to go home and attempt to sleep. I started to wonder more about my life and where it has ended up. I failed at college, dropping out after 2 years. I know my life hasn’t had excitement in it, or anything really that defined my life.

During that night I was wondering so much about my life I forgot to sleep. The sun crept passed the blinds blinding me in bed. I rolled off the bed and onto floor to shield myself from the blinding light that has entered my room.

So once again am in a position of will and power. I have the power to stand up and shut the blinds, but no will to do so. I also have the power to walk over to the phone and call Karin, but no will to even face the music. How much more lonely would I have to go threw before life has some meaning to it.