I am alone, and
I am bathing.
I am covered in bubbles and once again,
I am drunk.

I am emotional, and
I am flushed from the heat of the bath water, and now
I am getting a little lightheaded, and
I am having trouble remembering what I wanted to say. Oh, that’s right —

I am in love with you.

I am just taking a bath because
I am killing time. The truth is,
I am lonely without you. The other truth is,

I am married, and
I am not a good liar.
I am obviously in love with you, and
I am petrified that my husband will find out.

I am questioning everything now, and
I am really starting to think I’ve made a terrible mistake. But
I am scared of losing everything.

I am telling you, because you should know how I feel.
I am unhappy, and
I am very lost.

…

I am waking up again in a cold bathtub.
I am Xanax and
I am zinfandel, and I have a terrible headache.

I am surprised to see my phone on the floor beside the tub.
I am wondering who I called, what I said.
I am drawing a total blank.