Ah but just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you!

I like the lay out of this piece. It reflects the fractured thinking of the patient and also the fractured view of things that you get in hospitals. People come and go, days melt together, you’re just sure what the hell’s going on anymore.

I think maybe ‘blossum’ should be ‘blossom’ but aside from that fantastic writing.

I agree with thelostgirl – I like the setup here.

Thank you both!
And the ‘blossom’ misspelling has been corrected, so thanks for pointing that out!
=))

Great job dude! Nicely done!

The sense of (perhaps) unfounded but utterly unshakable dread is well conveyed.

Dark and gripping – I like it!

blossom = the perfect word

This is the best internal monologue I’ve read on this site ever. Crazy great job here!

This is really good and now I know what came before the sequel you wrote (I read the out of order). I do like this one even better. You’ve got a wonderful style. I love to get inside a character’s head, to know what they are thinking, feel what they are feeling. You’ve done that in spades. Really well done!