This was so well written. I’m speechless. I’m never speechless. Great entry.

this is very beautiful. As always, my friend, you are a worthy opponent. I am very impressed. The last line was fabulous.

Absolutely amazing work. The other comments really sum up my feelings.

Well written, of course, and a bit awesome (as in full of awe), but… a bit empty as well.

I don’t know. Maybe I crave character too much. Good job regardless of my ramblings.

I appreciate all comments – particularly yours Sam, as I recognise it’s lack of character, but I find that interesting l, considering it’s about all of creation.

Maybe in being impersonal, it’s making a comment on how insignificant each life is in the grand scheme of things… Just my take on it.

Thanks again! MH :)

Very nicely done. I think Sam’s too nitpicky. This was a great job and expanding and contracting and using the theme of dreams in a creative way.

I read this yesterday, and I didn’t write anything because I couldn’t really think of what to say. I can see Sam’s point about it feeling a bit empty. I don’t think it’s so much a lack of character, though.

I think it may have to do with the structure. Too many sentences are out there alone, seeming to not contribute to a greater whole. I think that may be what’s bothering me. I think this might work better if structured as a poem. It’s formatted as a narrative, and it doesn’t really read that way. Yes, that is what I think is bugging me.

It’s beautifully written, though. I love your descriptions and word choice. The closing line is excellent, bringing all of the individual thoughts together.

I think I’m going to leave it as is – some of those bigger paragraphs could be awkward to turn into poetry – I’m not much of a poet!

Still, thankyou… MH :)

The word choices in this are stunning – you used several of my all time favorite words in this. I actually liked the set up of it, and though it liked a character, as has been said, it’s beautifully descriptive and really well written =]

This is poetic prose so please don’t try to turn it into a poem. As far as I’m concerned its fine as it is.

You’re trying to do a lot here (essentially sum up life, the universe and everything) in a little space so every word needs to count and every word does.

The last line brings it all neatly together so I didn’t feel cheated or confused in the end.

So all in all, very nice work.

At first when you talked about an expanding speck I thought you were referring to the big bang theory, but you used the word Adapting and not Evolving, and then named everything as creation. Which was important for producing the awed feeling in our tummies after reading it :P
From the beginning it was making a story in my head, but only about halfway through was everything connecting for me. Thank you for the varied yet congruous adjectives. Lovely poetic prose – and I enjoyed the narrative.

Are you a Mason?

No I’m not very good at stonework…