17? Woah, he’s grown up fast. Struck me more as a bitter guy in his mid to late 20’s, but he’s just a teenager… And his wealthy client is also a teenager – a theme of dead parents going on here? I don’t think you need to write ‘ONE HOUR LATER’, just let the reader presume it. The next section should be particularly interesting, we’ll get to see this guy at work good and proper. MH :)
17? Woah, he’s grown up fast. Struck me more as a bitter guy in his mid to late 20’s, but he’s just a teenager…
And his wealthy client is also a teenager – a theme of dead parents going on here?
I don’t think you need to write ‘ONE HOUR LATER’, just let the reader presume it.
The next section should be particularly interesting, we’ll get to see this guy at work good and proper. MH :)
ya, what he said, (pointing aloft) great story btw.
Mostly Harmless 
Redheadedweirdo Mostly Harmless Redheadedweirdo