It was a dark and stormy night. Leorge Gucas sat in his office thinking about a new War Stars script as his pet Bungans burbled in their spacious aquarium: “Mesa, mesa, mesa!” While most would find the incessant burbling of Bungans incredibly obnoxious, Leorge found it relaxing, comical, and inspiring.

Lightning flashed, thunder roared, Leorge cackled.

“Yes,” Leorge muttered, “I shall call this new masterpiece Episode 0: Count Dooku takes a Sith.” Leorge furiously pounded on his typewriter. Pocketa, pocketa, pocketa!

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With each assault on the typewriter more horrifying lines were added to Leorge’s new script—lines that would make even H.P. Lovecraft retreat to a fetal position and suck his thumb in unfathomable fear.

Beads of sweat dripped from Protagonist’s face and he tossed and turned in his bed. Bruises began to appear on Protagonist’s body each time Leorge pounded on his typewriter.

“Protagonist! Protagonist! Wake up, you’re going to be late for school,” Protagonist’s mother yelled.