On a sunny day in August, I walk on a path on swampy ground in south Florida. I am brought to a quick stop by an alligator, basking in morning sunlight and blocking my way. It snaps its jaws at my approach so I’m obviously disturbing it. I try going around through tall grass which surrounds us on two fronts, but it finds rustling disturbing too.

Hiss. Snap.

Anxious to avoid dying and also to finish my walk, I think up a plan of action which, if I can carry it out, will follow with a satisfactory conclusion. Calling back to mind my days of vaulting during school, I go find a long, straight and suitably strong willow oak branch. Turning back again, alligator still blocking my trail, I run, plant, swing up and vault his back. On landing, I fling my branch away and hightail it out of sight, sounds of hissing quickly fading to nothing.