“Completely blanketing” try taking out the ‘completely’ and see how it reads. Blanketing already implies completely and I think it’s unnecessary. I love philosophical things like this— trying to figure out death with description and story. This is deep, I reeally dig this stuff. Keep it coming!

“monstrous and terrifying future of decaying memories.” — wow, this part is truly powerful. what talent!

ragefully? why is rage? you went off the deep end into dystopia and made your reader drink the vapors!

I personally inhaled the vapors, because it is so hard to drink a gas elsha, hehehehehe. jus needlin ya. Fish this is wacked i like it so far.

that’s why my comment was whacked..it was a mirror.. oh nevermind.