(ring ring)
“Hello, girl. You’re blushing!”

“Oh no! You caught me naked!”
This job’s hilarious. I know exactly what he wants in the first line he says; clearly acting out some fantasy.

“Come sit on my lap.”

“Mmm, you’re so hard.”
Shit, I need a wee!

“Oh yeah?”

“Is that supposed to go there?”
I hope he’s a quick comer.

“Does my hand feel nice here on your breast?”

“Mmm, it feels good. Does that make me bad? Am I a bad girl?”

“Oh no, not at all. Here, let daddy show you.”

“Mmhmm.”
I hear a groan from the other end of the line. This guy is clearly sick, but I keep going.

“Just sit here. Sit on daddy’s lap.”

“But what’s that? It looks a little big. Will it hurt?”

“Maybe a little, but good hurt, like a handcuff.”

“Good hurt?”
Please, I really need this wee.
“Mmm, it does feel good. All fuzzy inside.”

“I feel—”
A huge orgasm erupts from the other end of the line. I take my cue.
“Oh! Oh! Daaddyyy!”
A last moan comes from the other end.

“Thank you.”
(dial tone)

Thank God, hello bog.