You stand in front of a door wrought of thunderbolt iron, too heavy for your crowbar to prize open. There is a red button on the wall beside it.

>Push button

I don’t know how to “push” the button.

>Press button

I don’t know how to “press” the button.

>Touch button

I don’t know how to “touch” the button.

>Use button

I don’t know how to “use” the button.

>Hit button

I don’t know how to “hit” the button.

>Depress button

You tell the button all about your miserable childhood. It bursts into tears. The tears flood the cave and drown you. You are now dead.

>Fuck you

I don’t know how to “fuck” you.