Hah! The contrast between the idea that it’s good not to be a quitter and parents who are trying to save the cookie jar is great.

The ‘Do not…’ notes were very anti-Alice, the parent’s plan made me think of the Red Queen in Burton’s version. They don’t play fair.

You ought to know, the title alone made me single this story out to read, so I can definitely empathize with Xavier. Well done!

I tried so hard to not read this and I did it anyway. I am so glad I did. The concept is great and I agree with Akheloios about the anti-Alice idea. The notes and the cookies made me think of Alice growing and shrinking, which was sort of the outcome I was expecting for Xavier, but instead, he passed out, which was equally lovely. The twist at the end was suprisingly unexpected, of course, which was like the icing on top. Amazing job!!

I love that by reading this Ficly we’ve committed the same crime as Xavier. We found something more pleasant, though!

I think you could reword the last sentence to improve it.

I love that by reading this Ficly we’ve committed the same crime as Xavier. We found something more pleasant, though!

I think you could reword the last sentence to improve it.

Concise. I couldn’t resist the read either. While the thought that Xavier would pass out upon seeing the photos is funny, his young age would likely result in simple confusion instead.

Ha! Clever. I agree with Jae that Xavier might be too young to pass out but then I wonder if maybe the pictures aren’t what we’re all thinking ;o)