I faced north, from whence the cold wind blows; the tears streaming down my cheeks spreading the dust aside as with unbridled indifference a troop of mercenaries thrusts its way through an unruly crowd, trampling and elbowing as they go.

Never again.

Never again, I vowed inwardly. She’d hurt me for the last time. No explanation. No closure. It’s a dreadful thing to think, I know, but for me it would have been better if she’d died; or had never been. Not that I wish her dead. Oh no. Never. I love her.

That’s why I’m never going to open my heart to another woman and reveal my quirks, twists and joys. Be real and raw and clear and clean with her. I will not always be alone, but a part of me will remain mine and mine alone, hidden forever, locked in an impenetrable fortress of cold.

Never… Forever…

And then I met Jan and that changes everything…