The phone rings.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Eric, it’s Todd.”

“Hey,” I say, faintly taken aback—I know Todd from work, but we don’t talk much.

“Um—God,” he lets out in a big breath. “Eric, I’m so sorry. I was an idiot. I’ll understand if you hate me forever, especially for talking to you about it over the phone—”

“What?” A note of incredulity.

“What—Monica! Your wife, man—the…affair?”

“Affair?”

“Oh, Eric, don’t do this to me! Yeah, I screwed your wife, okay?”

“Todd—Todd! I don’t have a wife.”

“I can’t believe you’d—what?”

“I don’t have a wife.”

“Wait…” A sigh. “Is this Eric from 2014?”

“What? Todd, it’s 2009.”

He muttered a curse. “Not again…Uh, hey, just forget about it, okay?”

He hung up. I was left with the phone in hand for several minutes, deciding which was stranger: the fact that Todd is apparently my friend in 2014, or that I get a wife who’s hot enough to have an affair with.