Figuring it out

Of all the things absurd in life, I think looking back at one’s past is the most. I think we may be jealous of some of our friends because we think they’ve “got it made,” but I don’t think they’re any less embarrassed of who they used to be than we are. I know I’m practically ashamed of who I used to be — that I keep punching myself that I couldn’t figure things out sooner. But I don’t regret anything. Who cares if she cheated on you, who cares if you were bullied, who cares if you’ve had it rough. Life is as much an experience as it is a lesson. If I hadn’t fucked things up as much as I did then I wouldn’t be where I am today. I wouldn’t have the clarity and peace of mind I have now. I would have learned nothing. Now that I think about it, this is a stupid lesson. What I’m thinking should be common sense, but I had to experience it to understand it. To feel it.

Learn to move on. Don’t wallow in the past.

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