I closed my eyes, scrolled the cloud page up and down real fast, then stopped, opened my eyes and picked the first word that jumped out at me. >.>

I did take a little license, and made the sailors into pirates (that counts, right?).

And it’s tagged mature for language.

A collection of such oddities, it reminds me of Terry Pratchet which is a very good thing.

WOW. Hilarious! “Isle of magic my ass.” I can totally see Viviane giving you a look. Very nice!

Oh, and one more thing. Trolls CAN waltz. Kamiana is very graceful despite her awesomely hawt big feet. By trolls, I hope you mean the under bridges kind, not the Blizz kind.

I fail to see how the size of a woman’s foot would impair her ability to the horizontal tango.
Frankly i would not be supriesed if woman with large feet, all over the planet become outraged, and rise up against you. Turning on your whimsical large footedjudice, and seeking your life like you were the salman rashkie of pediatral predjudice. I am going to email uhma Thurman and peggy hill right now and get the ball rolling.

Nice work, Jess! A couple of edits… I think in your first paragraph “that is happily” should be “that are” or “who are.” And toward the end it says “so let’s home” when I’m sure you meant “so let’s hope.”

Thanks guys! I made myself giggle when I wrote this. ^^

MJY – I am a big footed woman myself, so I felt confident that I could make fun of it without consequences.

Aurelia – Yay me! I admire your stuff very much, so your compliments give me a swelled head. ;D Thanks for the edits…I fixed hope, but the the first one… “that is happily” is referring to the “shimmering gossamer”, so I’m pretty sure it’s right. But I’ll gladly take a second opinion if the line is still too clunky.

Ah, I see what you mean now about the shimmering gossamer — maybe it’s a comma placement thing? I don’t know, it’s a tricky sentence but I really like the imagery.

And thank you for the compliment!! - I really like your work as well! :)

Haha, that last line was golden! Thanks for entering!

Massively entertaining. Even in a world full of magic and wonder, there’s always something that just… sucks. In this case, many somethings.