I heard a loud crash as he slipped;
On his large, fat ass he had tripped.
His neck, it had broken
His face, it was swollen
And out of his nose, red blood dripped.
I stared with great horror
As the fat man lay quivering.
My legs warm and dripping
My knees cold and shivering.
With no jolliness or fun,
No happiness or cheer,
It looked like Christmas wasn’t coming this year.
Dang.