The cruise ship tender was late in arriving, so you walk down the high street in a huff. The audacity of those cruise people, blaming the lateness on the weather! But you showed them, and at least the manager gave you a complimentary voucher for the spa after he fired that uppity steward.

Wandering off the beaten track, you end up in a quiter part of town, streets lined with garbage bins and a sour taint to the air. Oblivous, you notice a little sign to a basement store. “Cultorama – choose the one for you”

“Good evening sir” You didn’t see the cadaverous apparition appear in the darkness of the store, so you jolt with shock. You spill your milkshake on your shirt. With a growl, you walk into the dingy bathroom to clean up.

As you look in the mirror, you notice that the frame is dark. You touch it, and a slight tackiness stains your fingertip dark red. You look in the mirror again, just in time to see the steward from the ship standing behind you, brandishing a large ceremonial mallet…