I think, in the first line of the last paragraph, you meant to put “pointed” instead of “pointe” shoes.

While the story doesn’t really go anywhere, it’s descriptive, and is good at not saying much.

no, sam that’s the term for ballet shoes, the ones you stand on, on your toes. silly boy!

Awesome moment. I really think those shoes are magical!

Beautiful imagery and tone. Although I’m not too keen on the carriage return after most of the sentences in both paragraphs, it is probably more a stylistic choice rather than a grammer faux pas.

Very sweet, personal moment. The first few sentence felt a bit long or over-done, but after that you found a nice rhythm for the piece. Lovely.

I like stories about ‘moments’. If you can pull of the imagery, which you can, then a story doesn’t need to have a pointe (see what I did there, huh?) to be good… Lovely :)

Lovely piece :) and LOL elsha’s comment. Well said!