I have a picture on my desk of Toph (from Avatar: the Last Airbender) with Wolverine’s claws emerging from her hands. It’s there to remind me that I can always make my writing more awesome.
If I give your story less than five pencils, it doesn’t mean that I hate you or your story. It just means that I didn’t quite dig it.
I don’t know when “dig” became my catchphrase on Ficly. It just kind of happened.
If you’d like me to sequel or prequel one of your works, send me a note.
When it comes to comments, I try to return the favor, so comment on my stories and I’ll try to comment on yours. (However, I should add that saying “lol” probably isn’t going to cut it.)
I have an unreasonable dislike for self-sequelers. It’s nothing personal, I just think that you should say what you can in 1024 characters, and then let someone else have a go. If you then want to sequel that sequel, you totally should.
Stories
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 40
Crackling with energy, Space/Time Lincoln warped into re-existence before the eyes of Time/Space Poe and Jules Verne. “Impossible,” said Verne breathlessly. “How can you return?” “True, it was a little impossible,” s...
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 37
Time/Space Poe leaped and dove around the madly grinning figure of Roosevelt, who cried “Bully! Bully! Bully!” with every shot. The dark-eyed writer, though fueled by an alchemical mixture of Ultrabsinthe, was tiring quickly. Roosevelt grew...
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Free
“Whoops, sorry man,” I say as the lamp tumbles to the ground and shatters. The sound is nearly drowned by the pumping music, the shouted conversations. The girl on my arm—oh hold on—Audrey, giggles drunkenly. Nate just laughs an...
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 33
“Sic semper tyrannis, punc!” said Booth, and pulled the trigger. His Magma-Gauss gun hissed and Lincoln crumpled, a thin wisp of smoke rising from his head. Rasputin’s dark, mad eyes stabbed into the piggy little LEDs of Mecha-Hitler....
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 29
“Lincoln.” Rasputin spat the word through cracked and blackened lips. The Mad Monk’s unblinking eyes were fixed on Lincoln’s goggles as if he could see through them into the great President’s mind. Lincoln reached for a bu...
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Exodus
It was not until he left her that he realized that he had been a slave. He knew there was a Promised Land, but he had no idea how to find it. He was okay with wandering, though.
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 25
Jules Verne’s airship swung around to pick up Theodore Roosevelt. When they were within reach, Poe held out his hand. “Thank you for your help, Mr. President,” Poe said. “Bully!” shouted Roosevelt, leveling his railgun at ...
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 23
“Your time has run out, pasty man!” yelled Genghis as his unicorn spat a gout of flames at Poe. Poe dove out of the way in a flutter of black coattails and swiped the unicorn’s nose with an upward spin of a Ravenchuck. The unicorn bel...
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Dear Ex-Boyfriend
Dear Ex-Boyfriend, Your girlfriend was good all year, too, so maybe next time you should check what’s on her Christmas list before blaming a guy for doing his job. Best, Santa
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 20
“Congratulations on defeating your shadow, Musashi-san,” said Lincoln, bowing. “And congratulations to you on defeating Archimedes’ terrifying death machine, Mr. President,” replied Musashi, returning Lincoln’s bow. ...
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 19
A slashing circular saw nearly brushed Space/Time Lincoln’s stovepipe hat as he dodged and ducked the attacks of Archimedes’ killing machine. Meanwhile, Musashi Miyamoto faced his shadow, both warriors posed for a strike but neither moving ...
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 17
The falling rain obscured the sodden green mountains outside the tiny temple. A lone figure knelt in meditation within. He did not move when Abe Lincoln popped into existence behind him. He only said, “I told you I should not have interfered.R...
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 8
Abe Lincoln, Miyamoto Musashi, and the Autoviathon containing Nikola Tesla’s head burst into meta-existence on a stairway. All around, other stairways crisscrossed each other at bizarre angles, but that did not seem to bother the monks and strang...
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 6
Marie Antoinette glided gracefully forward, her cannon spewing death. The intricate creatures shattered apart, their insides exploding in bursts of tiny gears and springs as the slugs tore through their heavy armor. “Unexpected element present,&#...
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 4
…Vlad’s body gave a spasm and he lurched to his feet. Louis turned to the two battered heroes. “Flee from this place. I will try to buy you some time.” As Louis and Vlad dueled, their swords flashing, Lincoln limped over to the ...
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The Ultimate Chronicle - Part 2
… the air wobbled as reality bent around Lincoln and the Autoviathon. Lincoln’s goggles amplified the light to reveal rough-hewn stone walls. “Where did you take us, my friend?” Lincoln asked. Though the inventor’s shrivel...
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Another Creed
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Misnomer
Post-apocalypse? Hardly. An apocalypse, by definition, cannot have a “post.” I should know. I had a PhD before the bombs fell. Nothing survives an apocalypse, and yet the wasteland is teeming with mutants, scavengers, and raiders. Sure, it ...
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Until The End of the World
Her father had always said that any boy she dated should at least own a car. He had never mentioned how useful a car was for getting away from radioactive mutant cannibals.
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Drinking Buddies...of sorts
Wallbreaker leaned heavily on the bar while perching precariously on his stool. “Man, this game has changed.” He drank from his stein of Guinness Extra Stout as though he was sick of it and wanted to see it gone. Professor Fortune was slumm...
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Teamup, pt. 3
Levi and Makoto ran the last fifty yards to the castle, surrounded by the walking dead every step of the way. The ninja and pirate ran in and threw their backs against the door, forcing it closed and securing it. After clearing the courtyard of ghouls,...
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No Need for a Hatter
Oily black smoke rose from the scuffed and battered pistol as though the grime on the weapon were seeping into the air around it. The man in black grinned, hopping over the four prone bodies before him with a step that was nearly a dance. He knelt at e...
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One of the guys
Victor Nelson seemed like he would make an excellent pirate someday. He was a strapping youth, rosy-cheeked and quick to lend a hand with work or sing a bawdy song. He could shimmy up a rope like a monkey or scamper through a packed hold like a rat. He...
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Teamup
The ninja shifted in the barn rafters to get a better view of the shabby pirate below. The pirate placed two pistols and his cutlass on the floor, then backed up from his weapons, looking around and calling out. The ninja couldn’t understand the ...
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Look, Daddy, a pirate!
The little boy tugged on his father’s hand. “Look, Daddy, a pirate!” His father looked over from a storefront window displaying the latest wigs from England. He glanced at the filthy man lying against the wall. “It’s just ...
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Yo Ho Ho and all that
Captain Barnabas “Barnacle” O’Sullivan was born on the sea, his mother giving birth to him while journeying to the New World. He joined the Royal Navy at the age of thirteen, became an officer at seventeen, and mutinied before he was ...
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Last Stand
Six bullets. Seven bandits. Boots on. ………………….
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...lead to disappointment
“‘Sup, bro? I’m back. Hey, what happened to my body?” “I traded it, but check it out, I got this totally sweet Trapper Keeper!” “Ah, no worries. Those are some awesome unicorns, buddeh.”
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Psst...
“Psst.” Prof. Anthrax didn’t look up. He kept his head down when he was working in the prison woodshop. It wasn’t that the other inmates intimidated him; he simply had nothing to say to the thick-necked mouth-breathers around hi...
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Try the bean dip. I hear it's "Super!"
At first glance, Neil and Steve looked like any other superheroes at the convention. A closer look revealed that Neil’s costume was a catcher’s outfit with a shredded bedhsheet over his shoulders, while Steve’s was a store-bought copy...
