Jape Prophets

Joined June 2009.

25 stories, 1 challenge, 37 comments, and 11 friends

I am appreciative of all comments and feedback and hope to find similar spirits in the vicinity.

Just a warning, any story that ends in ‘part #’ or a series in which the title is repeated with a number after it is an attempt to chronicle a card game that my friends and I play, so I’m not particularly interested in feedback on these, but everything else is appreciated.

Thank you to whoever created this site, it is a great way to spend an afternoon.

Jape Prophets


  1. God talks with Hitler

    Five minutes of silence and confused staring back and forth “Dude…what the hell was that?”

  2. Two different opinions on what work is worth

    “I asked for ‘Cherry Coke’, not grenade, or grenadine, or whatever you called it. Is there a manager I could talk to?” Her eyes were vapid, without intelligence and (one would assume) indicative of a woman who wouldn’t hav...

  3. A Clockwork Ficly

    What’s it going to be then eh? This is the life isn’t it guys? No, I know we don’t need money, but isn’t the actual robbing better than the cash we take? You don’t understand? I expect that kind of idiocy from Dim there, b...

  4. Where were we yesterday?

    We Praise our Media Scapegoats Posthumously—————————————-

  5. Survivors Anonymous Meeting

    “….Aaaaggghhh-ach Ahem. I’m sorry about that, something in my throat. My name is Zeke, and I eat brains,” “Hi Zeke,” a reply came from the shambling corpses around the room while they drank coffee and smoked cigarett...

  6. What Would Jesus Write? (Mature)

  7. Minneapolis by Night

    She got up in a more dignified manner than this place was used to seeing, turned and walked out the door. I was now alone with my coffee and once again wishing for the comfort of just one shot of Belvedere. Missing person. Naive wife. A trip down to Br...

  8. Paranoia at the Bad Waitress

    At this point I realized I was pouring sweat. This woman comes out of nowhere and hits on the very medicine I’ve been using all evening? Would chance allow this sort of thing, or was this some low grade sting set up by one of the security compani...

  9. Saved from the Hell (Mature)

  10. Remembering Our Present

    I still had a few minutes before I had to leave, so I decided to see what was happening in the world. Murder, murder, rape, murder, dog-show, murder. Good times. The cable news channels were busy running the top story which featured the sixth anniversa...

  11. What is 'The Torrenge'?

    “-what they do. You will never hear a liberal admit when they’re wrong, because honesty is just anti, anti…well anti-what they believe-“ “That’s what I’m saying, and to hear these people whine-“ Click. Sweating, dark. Hazy picture,...

  12. Cum 'n Sense (Mature)

  13. War for Minneapolis Part 3

    “What do you want Jinko?” Tyler was tired. Strands of blonde hair fell in front of her eyes as she fell back into the black leather recliner that she considered to be her ‘thinking chair’. “Sire, I thought you should know...

  14. War for Minneapolis Part 2 (Mature)

  15. War for Minneapolis Part 1

    Gabriel shuddered against the biting wind of the Minneapolis night. No matter how often he stayed here he never quite got used to the weather. He heard that the summers were almost brutally hot. Of course, to the undead, any amount of sunlight was term...

  16. Chicago Chronicles Part 10

    “The Caves”, as they were known on Campus, were a series of pits, alcoves, and hideaways which ran along the river and were used for parties and hooking up. Elimelech was reminded of the region along the Afghanistan/Pakistan border. The places to h...

  17. Chicago Chronicles Part 9

    “That self indulgent little cunt!” Illyana stormed around her office, on the verge of frenzy. “Do you have any idea how many times I’ve sacrificed for him? And he has the audacity to ask me to loan his shell company twenty million dollars befor...

  18. Chicago Chronicles Part 8

    I had been awakened sometime in the afternoon by a call from a possible employer. My room was dark, but my internal clock told me it was far too early for any respectable speed freak to be up. “This had better be important goddamnit! How did you get...

  19. Chicago Chronicles Part 7

    The gang members body lay where it fallen from the gunshot. Only sixteen years old, Terrence never thought he would be shot in the head at midnight, miles away from his parents house in the suburbs. He didn’t even smoke. It was supposed to be an init...

  20. Chicago Chronicles Part 6

    Illyana silently congratulated herself on retaining Diana. Smart, aggressive, and loyal were hard qualities to find in one package. “Diana, I need you to fly to D.C., and meet with the Prince there,” “But-“ Illyana waved her dismissively. ...

  21. Chicago Chronicles Part 5

    “I’m tellin’ ya man, this is what you’re lookin’ for,” Hagar squinted out of habit. Looking at a vial of blood in a dark alleyway seemed to require squinting. “Don’t fuck around with me, hippie,” Hagar disliked dealing through Heale...

  22. Chicago Chronicles Part 4

    “Miss Radovich, if you do need anything…you know how to find me,” a thin voice hissed. The hideous form of Khalid then slipped back into the shadows and was gone. Not a moment too soon, Illyana thought to herself. The smell was overpowering. She...

  23. Chicago Chronicles Part 3

    “Well I didn’t come all the way out here to watch hotel HBO,” Hagar said emotionlessly into the phone. “I was told that once I got here the contracts would be ready to sign. I’m staying the night, and if I haven’t heard anything by morning ...

  24. Chicago Chronicles Part 2

    The village burned behind him as he strode confidently into the chaos of battle. How many years had it been since he had enjoyed anything else? The memories all blend together into a hymn of endless blood and night. Now he was on a parapet, holding a m...

  25. Chicago Chronicles Part 1

    Illyana Radovich hated to fly. In fact, one of the aspects she enjoyed most about her new…condition…was the tendency of people like her to stay nice and tucked into the city, letting other, less important people jet around the globe taking care of ...

Jape Prophets' Friends (11)

  • YaYa
  • Rehab
  • Jordyn
  • ElshaHawk (LoA)
  • Jermaine Champagne
  • Stovohobo
  • THX 0477
  • John Perkins
  • jesteram
  • futurist
  • monkeybomb

Jape Prophets' Followers (6)

  • Rehab
  • Jermaine Champagne
  • N555champ & X-Ninja
  • monkeybomb
  • ElshaHawk (LoA)
  • Mackizme