I did not see that coming! He can never preen effectively again! Brilliant!

However, I felt this piece was bogged down in sentences starting with ‘he’, and again, unclear paragraphing.

Still, creatively, you redeemed yourself with that last twist – brings the story full circle and ties up any loose ends… MH :)

I liked the use of the word “he”. It helped to emphasize his narcissism which made the ending completely logical. He’s an immortal bafoon. Ha ha.

I’m really loving the content, but there are several grammar things which are ‘distracting from the experience.’

“He could smell it, he could smell the humans, there scent was in the air.” I assume you mean ‘their’, not ‘there’. Also, the second comma is a comma splice.

“He had to drink the blood of a human, strangely he was alright with that, in fact he was looking forward to it.” First comma is another splice, and I’m not sure I like the second one either.

“It was for Blood.” Considering what the first sentence says, I suspect that you may want to rephrase this.

“He decided to return to his place, things hadn’t been touched. Which wasn’t odd as no one knew where he lived.” First comma is a splice, second sentence is a run-on, you need a comma.

“Then he spotted something, or rather he didn’t spot something.” Consider a comma after ‘rather’.

So I can finish on a compliment: your grammar is good enough to critique. :-) I know people who have grammar so awful I wouldn’t know where to start.

Thanks for reading and commenting, hope you liked the piece from a creative point of view. Apologies regarding my grammar, it is my nemesis.
On the bright side things can only get better.