Wrong Turn At Albuquerque

Avatar Author: Textual Phoenix A former Ficleteer. Now, I am a Ficly acolyte - a Ficlyte, if you will. (You can thank uselessness for that term!) Spread the word, brothers and sisters! :-D 10/23/13 - Over 2 years since I last posted something her... Read Bio

Declan’s eyes snapped open. He was still laying down, but the doctors were gone. As he slowly became more and more aware, he realized that the hospital was, too. He was stiff and sore, and wasn’t moving too good, so he just looked around for a moment.

The first thing he noticed was the person about to sit on him.

“Woah!” he yelled.

“Jesus Murphy!” Jeron screamed, leaping away from the couch.

“Sweet Larry, brother of Todd!” Kyle shouted as he fell out of his chair. Both of them scrambled back, as far away from Declan as the walls of their apartment would let them.

“Who the…” Jeron started. “Wait.” He turned to Kyle. “‘Sweet Larry, brother of Todd’, Kyle?”

“Y-Yeah,” Kyle stuttered, his heart hammering in his throat. “The one time I said ‘Sweet Mary, mother of God’, mom slapped me so hard, I saw stars for an hour. Now…” He pointed at Declan. “Can we get back to more important things?!”

From it’s grotto, Death double checked it’s notes on Declan’s return.

“Aw, nuts,” it groaned. “Not again…”

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  1. Ahfl_icon THX 0477

    Funny, and I love the odd exclamation, which totally keeps with the original characters. Bonus points for looping it back to where it started, even if I didn’t follow completely exactly what happened.

  2. Avatar uselessness

    So, Declan died but got lost on the way to the hereafter? And ended up as a talking couch?

  3. Avatar Textual Phoenix

    Not quite. He died, was given the choice of the afterlife or going back, and was sent back to the wrong world, winding up on Kyle and Jeron’s couch. :-)

  4. Avatar ElshaHawk (LoA)

    well at least they met! The interview of Declan about Death should be interesting..

  5. Avatar OrangeOreos (LoA)

    Haha! I like Death’s little comment at the end.

  6. Avatar Alexa Reed (LoA)

    That did confuse me, but it’s okay because I like “Sweet Larry, brother of Todd!”

    I also think it’s great that you cut out all of that middle stuff where the idiots find out about Declan & try to find a way to Ireland. (With these 2, I think they’d walk.)

  7. Avatar ♦ Jenunique ♦

    “Sweet Larry, brother of Todd”— reminded me of The Gospel According to Larry… I am loving this series.

    BTW- It’s so good to see everyone back!

  8. Avatar Stovohobo

    I agree with Alexa; it sure shortens things up to have him land in their room. At first I thought it was a little cheap, but the last sentence fixed it.

  9. Avatar Clotifoth

    Hah, great detail on his childhood raising.

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