Pecking Order

Avatar Author: S. Zee I'm a lawyer (please keep booing and hissing to a minimum), born and raised in Kansas (please refrain from any Dorothy, Toto, or "not in Kansas anymore" references, or I may cut you). I enjoy travel, chocolate, old films,... Read Bio

“Just look at her.”

The teenage girls huddled together. Usually ruffling, preening, and cooing at each other over shiny new clothes and shoes, currently their attentions were on a lone figure across the yard. She was nearly identical to them, slender, shining mid-length hair, eyes fringed by long lashes, rosebud mouth. Just the same as they. Except. . . .

Serena wasn’t interested in them. She preferred being alone. Dressed plain, She blended into the beige buildings and gray stones of the schoolyard. However, she glowed from within. She was entertained beyond the mainstream, outside the box. Today she was reading, humming an unfamiliar melody.

“She has a tattoo. She hides it under those ugly skirts, but it’s so there.”

“All of you, just SHUT UP!” The ringleader fluttered. They froze. “Don’t you get it? She’s different. Don’t you know how dangerous she is? She could ruin everything. We can’t just ignore her. We have to stop her.”

Serena looked up to see the flock of girls moving toward her.

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Comments (7 so far!)

Average Reader Rating

  1. Avatar ernmander

    I loved this, can see many sequels and prequels here

  2. Avatar gĀ²LaPianistaIrlandesa

    nearly falls off cliffhanger Yowza! I agree with ernmander, this could go in several different directions. What’s this “everything” Serena could ruin? Hm…

    Thanks for entering!

  3. Avatar S. Zee

    Thanks! The “everything” I had in mind is the ringleader’s idea of what is “right” and “proper” and “good” in this society. Tattoos, underground music, and free thinking are not allowed.

  4. Avatar Nancy

    great descriptions here!

  5. Avatar scratch'n'scrawl

    mmm…lovely.
    I think I might keep an eye on this one.

  6. Avatar Angrypencils

    Wow, this has some serious potential!

  7. Avatar Slightnmighty

    Ooooooh, mean girls! Hold your own Ms. Plain Jane! I like this, it flowed really well and the points of view felt really dynamic. There were a few minor technical things like capitalization in the second sentence, but nothing distracting from the story.