Unfortunately He'd Left His Benadryl At Home

Avatar Author: Ben Paddon British-born writer and geek humorist living and working in Los Angeles, California. I'm the writer and host of PortsCenter (http://portscenter.tv/), the co-creator and co-writer of Dalek Gary (http://twitter.com/dalek... Read Bio

Lawrence would often tell people he was allergic to being harpooned through the chest with a spear, but noone believed him until that night.

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Comments (18 so far!)

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  1. Avatar StudMuffin (LoA)

    Lmao.
    Awesomness.

  2. Avatar Coccinella

    Great!! Though the title is kind of cheating the character limit, no?

  3. Avatar Ben Paddon

    The title is ironic.

  4. Avatar ElshaHawk (LoA)

    would they even do an autopsy to prove it was anaphylactic shock? the giant hole in his chest is kind of a dead give away.

  5. Avatar Coccinella

    Oh. Duh. Yes, irony, I think I remember that now. But it still… never mind ;-)

  6. Avatar B. Booth

    BWahahaahah!

  7. Avatar Mighty-Joe Young (A.K.A Strong Coffee)(LoA)

    no the title is coincidental. Irony is with literal definition and the implied definition are the exact opposite. Allanis Morrisette ruined an entire generation because she didn’t want to sing a song called isn’t it coincidental.

  8. Avatar Ben Paddon

    The irony of Allanis Morisette’s “Irony” is that it wasn’t ironic, and I think she knew that when she was writing it. She’s smarter than she looks, is Allanis – you need only see her cover of Black Eyed Peas’ “My Humps” to know that.

  9. Avatar OrangeOreos (LoA)

    Haha, actually, if you read the story alone and forget the title, it still makes for a great one-liner. The title, me thinks, jsut adds to it.

  10. Avatar StudMuffin (LoA)

    hahaha,
    I agree with Mighty Joe

  11. Avatar Mighty-Joe Young (A.K.A Strong Coffee)(LoA)

    i agree with broccoli head
    and allanis is an idiot

  12. Avatar g²LaPianistaIrlandesa

    Ironic or not, I found this insanely amusing. But the ending implies tht there just might be more to this…
    That’s just me, though. As it stands, most excellent.

  13. Avatar Scott

    This reminds me of Jack Handey.

  14. Avatar April Raines

    Other than the fact I’m believe no one is two words – well, hey, it’s Twitter. We all cheat. :)

    @MJY I believe Ben is demonstrating dramatic irony, as opposed to verbal irony which you defined. Ben seems very fond of his dramatic irony.

    @ Scott Yes! Jack Handey! Thank you, I couldn’t put my finger on it.

    As for Alanis, I’m sure she does know what ‘Ironic’ means, but that doesn’t mean the song is all ironic. I like Ben’s take, though I sort of doubt it.

    As usual, Ben, a twisted delight!

  15. Avatar Mighty-Joe Young (A.K.A Strong Coffee)(LoA)

    thanks april you always tidy everything up.

  16. Avatar Ben Paddon

    She has a talent for that, does April.

    And there’s a lot of evidence to support my “Alanis Morrisette is pretty damned smart” theory. Take her appearance in “Curb Your Enthusiasm” for instance, or any of the lyrics to her other songs. Or, and I’ve already said this one, listen to her cover of “My Humps”, which is a thing of beauty.

  17. Avatar April Raines

    It’s the teacher in me. Or the bossy know-it-all. Oh, wait, that’s redundant! ;)

    Of course Alanis is smart, after is she is God. (You have watched D0gma, right?)

  18. Avatar Ben Paddon

    I love Dogma. It’s one of my favourite films out there, and definitely my favourite religously-themed film. As an Atheist I am in favour of anyone analyzing what it is they believe in, be it science, religion, whatever. It is, I think, foolish to deal in absolutes, to NOT question your beliefs and just accept something because it’s written in some book. That goes for all things – not just faith in some magical space wizard. :)

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