Good pacing, nice setup. I’d like to see this go somewhere.

Good pacing, nice setup. I’d like to see this go somewhere.

Couple of errors spell-check didn’t catch… no-one is still no one, no dash… and secretaty should be secretary.

That aside, the pacing (like Stewart said) is solid.

Thanks for the spell-check :)

Don’t know where I’ll take it yet, but we’ll see… MH

Very fun beginning there. A little disappointed she doesn’t have daddy issues, but that’s a professional bias. ;-) Still, I think that plays nicely off of how cliche daddy issues are to set up her character.

I like that she doesn’t have daddy issues, but what about her mother? o_O
lol and I thought it was spelled “diarrhea”? I googled it and a lot of different spellings came up so idk lol but I learned a lot about it :D

This sort of reminds me of that short-lived show Courteney Cox-Arquette was in a year or two ago.

This is a great character sketch. I wonder where the tale could go from there.

Bit like Moonlighting.

I like this, a quick talking, over-organised boss. Maybe how she worked her way up the ranks could be a prequel? Just a suggestion…

OOOOH! I LOVE IT! I’ve been waiting to read this since you told me about it! Five Pencils, no doubt!

I’m not calling any dibs on this one by the way – if anybody’s up for it all sequels/prequels are welcomed… MH

It is a great character sketch; a nice jumping off point. i just don’t know what to do without a hurdle to overcome inside the character. I mean I have a feeling any problem we throw at her, blackmail by a superstar over photos, robbery of her work or home, fire, or car accident, she’d simply plow right through it and go on being a bitch..

hey harmless who won your detective challenge?

Elsha that’s exactly how I feel… I look back on it and I’m really happy how it turned out, but it’ll take something a bit different to avoid the whole ‘Ugly Betty’ cliche and make it orginal :) I’ll get thinking :D

Oh and MJY it was April Raines with ‘When The Clock Stopped’, although of course your entry was superb, the combination of your desire NOT to win and the fact that April’s story was fantastic gave her the prize :)

like how it immedately grabs expectations and then throws them away

sounds like a good character in the making

Yummy. Very bitchy. I like.

certainly set for a sequel. The character is set for developement. Nicely done.
Abby x