Franklin, king of the animals.

Avatar Author: cathy1993 What can I say. I love to write, it is my biggest passion. Please comment on my pieces, I want to learn! I LOVE FICLY Check out my blog at Follow me on twitter @cathyb1993 Read Bio

The story begins before humans even came to be. My name is Franklin, and I invented the human race. I am, what a mere simpleton would call a turtle. Yes a turtle.
You thought pigs where intelligent. Well my friends I invented pigs. And no, I do not have a moustache. I invented the moustache.

The world would be a sorry place was it not for turtles.

Oh wait. Does this sound like a children’s story? Take that smile off your face. Everything you knew before reading this was a lie. You probably haven’t even heard of Franklin. You have now. You see up until now I kept my existence a secret, because even my own children would not understand. You have heard people say ‘we are all children of god’s earth.’ That statement is incorrect, try: ‘we are all children of Franklin’s earth’. And Franklin is a turtle.


Owls are called owls. God, even frogs have a name. Ha, I invented them.

But my name is Franklin, and Windows Seven was my idea.

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Comments (15 so far!)

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  1. Avatar Kihd

    HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! I died on the last line! And then I came back to life just to read it again! Holy crap, this made my freaking day. It is sad that I take so much pleasure out of imagining Franklin’s voice while reading this.

    It deserves six, but here, have five pencils. Buy yourself something nice.

  2. Avatar maximumride36

    LMFAO!!!!!! that last line is so freaking funny!!! XD
    And i agree with Kihd, that line made my day.

  3. Avatar cathy1993

    Oh My Gosh, thank you for the great comments guys!! You made my day :D x

  4. Avatar Marli

    This took being named Franklin to a whole new universe. Pun intended. Very humerous take on the challenge Cathy.

  5. Avatar The Silence [All By Myself] {LoA}

    LOL! I never would have imagined franklins voice to be so cold and calculating if it weren’t for this ficly! I’ll never look at franklin the same way again! xD

  6. Avatar JC Tovil

    This story is hilarious! Nice work.

  7. Avatar cathy1993

    Thank you guys! I love the good comments. Do you think a franklin mini series would be too much?

  8. Ahfl_icon THX 0477

    That was hilarious, especially the ending. It delightfully teeters between new mythology and psychotic rant. I also like the correction that this isn’t a children’s story.

  9. Avatar cathy1993

    Yaaayyyy I’m featured !!! That has never happened to me before!

  10. Avatar Jessica Cahill

    And well deserved! This fic is wonderful, and your timing is just gorgeous. I love how megalomaniacal he sounds and it doesn’t matter if it’s true or not. And yes, the last line is genius.

  11. Avatar Kihd

    Agreed w/ Jessica! This story continually makes me laugh, especially when he’s like “Does this look like a children’s story? Take that smile off your face.” He is so psychotic sounding!

    Congratulations, you really earned it. :D

  12. Avatar Marli

    Congrats on the feature Cathy. Also on winning the challenge. Well done.

  13. Avatar cathy1993

    Wow thank you so much everyone!!!! Thank you for choosing me as the winner! Yayyy

  14. Avatar Dressed in Lace

    This is just so funny! You have such an amazing imagination!

  15. Avatar RoseTone ~LoA~

    ….oh my god….

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