zzzt..zzt. the man is sparking on the ground.. lol. What a power to have! This feels like a challenge entry for one where the villain didn’t realize they were villainous..
great job with this, it is extremely unique, at least to me, and fantastically executed in the character limit!

lol. sure God gave us free will XD and she’s using her will to manipulate others XD no matter how you slice it the fixed person still has free will! great story i would never have dreamed up a super power like that. And i love the line where the girl says “But God gave us free will.”

this really a good story it has an onimous dark tone yet still is human i love it

Oooh. Creepy and unsettling. Something about this reminds me of the movie Hard Candy.

Very interesting. So interested, I felt compelled to add on. :D

Ominous, freaky – and a nice twist on “the evil within” – because we’re not sure whether the narrator is perhaps even more evil (or is it just amoral?) than the rapist. I think you could tighten up on extraneous bits of description that don’t add to the story: “…and the worry I see there sparks anger”; “she takes a step back, afraid” (the step back TELLS us she’s afraid… once you’ve shown, no need to tell); “fear and love tangling in her expression”… I’d strip it down a bit more, intensify the mood and the drama even more. Nicely done!

Thanks for the comment Coccinella, and I did change one of them, but the others I have to disagree, and that’s alright.

The lines you comment on in particular I think are needed for characterization. There is a certain dynamic I want between them, that I’m not sure will be clear if I take all the description out. I could be wrong, and would certainly look at it again with a suggestion.