Really cute. I love it! Will there be a sequel where they get together?

Cute and sudden, but I think it winds up doing a good job of conveying the craziness and foolishness of youth, that he would go from tormenting to kissing, all in a horrible clumsy way.

yeah THX said it, craziness, clumsiness, and foolishness of youth. That’s what makes it cute.

don’t you just hate it when that happens. The grammar of the sentence "He was hardly surprised to see silver cobwebs were the design on her umbrella. " could be improved though.

Hmm, a sequel would be nice but if someone else wants to write it then go for it. I’d like to see what you guys can do with these two.
Changed that sentence as suggested. Think it’s a little better now.
Thanks for the comments :)

nooo! I really want them to get together. Please, you have to. This is an omen to me.
I really love this. Thanks.

Yes, it takes a lot of apologizing to make up for that youthful ‘exuberance’. This is very authentic.

Wow. The name of this peice is what immediately caught my attention. I checked it out and was glad I did! Ironic that she would have a spider web umbrella. XD I would feel the exact same way if some girl took pictures of me in the locker room. Then again maybe not. XD 5 Lapices!