A friend of mine (She is 5) decided to come up and ask me to write a different version of Jack & The Beanstalk because she was reading it in school now. I said OK, not knowing what I was getting into but I didn’t want to hurt her feelings.

I had to do some research on the story because I didn’t remember how it went. I must say that I am appalled by it…

I hate it when the real version of fairytales is terrifying and nightmare-inducing. Who on earth thought, “Oh, I know, I’ll make a kid-friendly version of this horror story!”

oh all the tales are actually quite frightening. wolves, witches, dead mothers, curses, but a hero needs a terrible thing to overcome..

The “hero” in this one is a lazy, thieving boy who doesn’t know how to do anything and has no sense of self-preservation

Forgive my severity but I really hated Jack & The Beanstalk

Pretty much all the Grimm fairy stories are… how shall we put it… er… grim in the extreme. There’s one (I’ve heard) that concludes with the wicked witch being made to dance in metal shoes that have just been roasting in a hot fire. Delightful.

I applaud your honest assessment of the original: too often, we gloss over the gore and pretend it’s all OK. After all, it’s only a fairy story.

Perhaps the problem is assuming early fairy tales were meant to be didactic in nature. In that sense, your ficlet here pretty much captures the reasoning behind all the Disneyfied revisions.

A book review, in story form! Brilliant!

Agree with Ethel. The brother’s Grimm’s stories are absolutely horrific. Bluebeard comes to mind. We grow up with them and only see the good but reading them as adults they can seem absolutely atrocious. Some kids actually enjoy the gruesome stuff and I know that, when I was younger, I’d have taken the original, more gothic version over disney any day.

I had exactly the same thought as you when watching ‘Puss in Boots’. These aren’t the kind of messages we should be giving kids. Although … it is just a story.

Hmm. I think there could be a good debate here. Thanks for starting it and for entering the challenge. Ya made me think =)

Yeah, the version of the fairy tales we grew up with are greatly tamed from the originals. Even our nursery rhymes, if you go back and study the etymology, are pretty gruesome. But then again, they were never really meant for children. Most were written as political statements of the day.

Very good point about the political statements, Jim. I hadn’t thought of that.

Therefore the hero here is a brat who stumbled into money and becomes a spoiled brat who would tout that he came from humble beginnings just like the people he snubs so they should vote for him if he were running for office. :)

Bahahaha! Awesome, Elsha, just awesome! XD

Honestly the title kept me from reading this even though it kept getting comment after comment from my peers here. Vomit grosses me out. I like all the versions of the children’s stories because they make me think and also remind me of other things- in this case the WB version of J&tBS. However I applaud the “this sucks I will make it better” vibe. Writer’s best work often comes from “negative” inspiration.

hehe, I like the “pacing like a tiger” line, I imagined the character in the story on all fours, stalking around the kitchen. I’m a simile addict.

Oh yes.

This is… yes. I like this. c: I totally see where you’re coming from.

“…pacing like a tiger across the dining room floor.”

I love this simile because I can absolutely relate. I did the same thing when I finished Of Mice and Men…after I threw the book across the room.

A lot of those old stories are appalling by today’s standards. We all know the gradually watered down versions made palatable for our age and sensibilities. I’m not sure if the original was so much as sending a message as it was just a fun read in terms of wish fulfillment.

old fairy tales are darn scary but I bet they did the job…if we grew up with them I bet there’d be none of the problems that young people have today (says the almost 19 year old…)

I’m sorry, Timber, but you can’t really compare a disneyfied PG-(-6.2) to a Steinbeck novel. Besides, Of Mice and Men was a grea book. The ending was almost enough to make me cry. Almost… I agree that when kid goggles wear off we get those “Oh God…” moments when we take another look at things we used to read/watch/listen to. I’m just waiting till the idiots of today hit that point and realise that the popular songs they’re listening to are utter bull.

But that’s me. More on topic, I guess you could find the harsher meanings behind anything. Grimm tales of course, but you could probably pull the dark morals from Aesop’s fables, too. The lion and the mouse: Always be nice to people. Or they’ll eat you.

I actually find it interesting to read the real versions of fairy tales. Most are very dark but they were also to serve a very different purpose when they were originally being told. They were to teach lessons, yes mainly by fear of the consequences. In a way despite the magic and the faeries that old version are a much better depiction of how life works than modern ones.

Darker stories for a darker time, I think. That’s the great thing about stories: they change to fit the times, to fit the author and to fit the audience. Although I really loved that “grind his bones to make my bread” thing as a kid.

“Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder.
Elves are marvelous. They cause marvels.
Elves are fantastic. They create fantasies.
Elves are glamorous. They project glamour.
Elves are enchanting. They weave enchantment.
Elves are terrific. They beget terror.
The thing about words is that meanings can twist just like a snake, and if you want to find snakes look for them behind words that have changed their meaning.
No one ever said elves are nice.
Elves are bad.”
~Terry Pratchett

Seems like the hero was always either a simple minded boy scout or a roguish ex-soldier.