StudMuffin (LoA)

Joined June 2009 and calls Facemuffin (Studbook?) home.

172 stories, 15 challenges, 669 comments, and 174 friends

I’m 20. I live in Hastings, UK.
Uhhh I’m going to school for illustration, but sometimes I just, like, love writing.

Back when I was 15, I was a member of this site in it’s earliest days and I stopped using it after a while for reasons unknown. Well I’m back for now!


  1. A Event of Nuclear Proportions

    He was sleeping when the bomb went off. The explosion didn’t wake him, he was a heavy sleeper. No, what woke him was the body that went flying through his window, only to slam against the wall, leaving a trail of blood and an arm lying on the bed...

  2. She Turned Around

    She turned around, he spat the food onto his plate, scraped it into the dogs mouth. “That was delicious,” he said. Because he loved her.

  3. I forgot

    I forgot the laws of gravity, and I learned how to fly. I forgot the cycle of day and night, and never ran out of time. And I forgot about economy, money appeared on sight. I forgot about our morals, what was wrong was now right. I forgot that nations ...

  4. A Hit

    Connie led the them outside, the beeping growing more intense. Connie grabbed Tessa’s arm, Perry grabbed another. “Brace yourself, Tessa!!” Connie said, throwing her hand up in the air in a “Thumbs Up” position. “Wh...

  5. A Poem (A Poem)

    This used to be a poem (well, I guess… it still is) But I went crazy and deleted it, because I thought it was shit. And because we can’t actually delete, (which makes me kinda pissed). I’ll replace it with some other thing, though I d...

  6. No Comprende.....

      

  7. Before It's Too Late!!

    They belted it. Shawn held the umbrella in his left hand, his handgun in the right. As he ran, he fired round after round behind them, the rain making it harder to see. Faith yelled at Shawn, trying to get him to toss her the umbrella, but the thunder ...

  8. A True Villain

    “Freeze!” The policeman had no reason to yell verbs at me. I wasn’t running. I always thought when they have those wild ten minute chase scenes in movies, it really just shows how much of a coward the bad guy is. I wouldn’t run....

  9. Spot

    See Spot. See Spot Run. Go Spot! Go! See Spot pick up pace. See Spot Sprint. See Spot nervously glance behind him. See Spot Pant. See Spot Trip. See Spot Cower. See Spot Die. Go Spot. Go.

  10. Go!

    “Run!” They ran down the abandoned street, the trail of explosions and debris drawing nearer.

  11. What the Hell is this?!

    They heard a noise. Someone was coming upstairs. “You said your wife was out of town,” she said, almost emotionless. “She is…. I think.” he said, struggling to put his pants on before his wife walked into the room. The doo...

  12. It's all in the tags, baby.

    Wellll….. I kinda cheated. I wrote my story in the tags. This is less than 140, though.

  13. A Real Concert

    The crowd went wild. They threw their hands into the air, praising him. He loved every second of it. He left the microphone, leaving them wanting more. He walked around on the stage, listening to them cheer his name. It was orgasmic. He stood there for...

  14. The Party (a haiku)

    I’m at a party. We are all having fun. Hey. Who brought the liquor?

  15. You see that?

    She worked at the yard sale. He shopped at the yard sale. She noticed that he looked up at her every thirty seconds. Exactly thirty seconds. She had counted. She found it adorable that every time she looked up at him, he would immediately look back dow...

  16. Fight Club ( A Haiku)

    I am Jacks liver. His name was Robert Paulson. I’m Tyler Durden.

  17. Tears

    She stared at the blood on her hands. She had taken a life. She looked up at her mother, who told her it was time to go. Time to go before it was too late. She took a napkin, wiped at the blood. Out! Out damned spot! She looked up at her mother, who wa...

  18. Another Haiku.

    If I had a wish, I would wish for a fish. Oh, what a tasty dish.

  19. Paranoid

    They’re coming. I…. I know it, I can feel their presence. My knee always swells up when bad shit starts happening They’re coming. And they’re going to find me. And they’re going to kill me. And they’re going to…...

  20. Hey, are your parents.......

    He slicked his hair back. He sprayed his mouth with Listerine. Damn, he looked good. He sauntered over to the barstool next to a woman. A beautiful woman. Damn, she looked good. “Hey,” he called to the bartender, “gimme a dry martini....

  21. Pornography

    He was done with the pictures of luscious young women he had printed out that night. He hid it under his bed, knowing his mother would not look there. The next morning, he woke up, showered, brushed his teeth. At school, he reached into his backpack to...

  22. A Haiku

    Haikus are easy but sometimes they don’t make sense. Refridgerator.

  23. A Note Left on a Refridgerator

    Alright, Dude. This is not easy for me to ask, but I need your help. Let me repeat, I NEED your help. This is not an option. I’m bringing a girl home tonight, and… well…. I’m desperate. And she thinks I’m a lot better at c...

  24. Up in the sky! It's a Stud! It's a muffin! It's Studmuffin!!!

    “1,497……1,498…..1,499…..15,0-” The Muffin was just finishing his set (He lifted 50 pounds, which doesn’t sound like much, but is quite remarkable when you consider the size of your average muffin), when a young...

  25. Pacmans Lament

    I…. I ate him. The ghosts were on my tail. Yellow dots formed a line in front of me, a line I knew would lead somewhere. I had to eat them. I… I just had to. Just like I ate….. Iate him. I turned left, a giant fruit got in my way. I d...

  26. An Awkward Trip Down a Mountain (Mature)

  27. Getting Dumped SUCKS. (Emotion Challenge)

    Ripping, Tearing, Annoying I feel like destroying. Screaming, Crying, Thrashing Find something, start bashing. Dying, Trying, Failing All my limbs flailing. Breaking, Snapping, Paying My brain is decaying. Kicking, Punching, Throwing My head is explodi...

  28. Pure Adrenaline

    I tripped off of the edge of the cliff. I tumbled downwards, my clothes whipping around me, my hair stinging my eyes. I began to turn and face the ground when a fiery explosion sent cars shooting off of the clifftop. Trucks following me down the side o...

  29. A Poem

    I Stand on my feet I watch the sky think, “Isn’t that sweet?” then start to cry I look down below, my crotch feels a TWANG The pain starts to grow, ‘till it’s freaking insane I grab hold of my pants try to stop the hurt I ...

  30. 1001010101001010111

    She moans. Turn. Thrust. Thrust. She raises her hands in the air, commands me to touch her. I follow, as I was programmed. She screams in pleasure. She begins to slow down, explains she wants to savor the last moments. She whispers that she loves me. C...

StudMuffin (LoA)'s Friends (174)

  • Never Explain (LoA)
  • Music-Hearted
  • Francis James
  • SweetSummerBlizzard
  • domokun
  • Lauren of Cydonia
  • Fyora Cartagan
  • Kater
  • Sam Ervin
  • these are your nuts, sir
  • MrsMica
  • Transceiver Frequency
  • Pieces of Andi
  • Yuriy Zubovski
  • Clotifoth
  • quipsofthequill
  • White Hat
  • Krulltar
  • Again St.
  • ProvokingThieves
  • iLive The Hard Way
  • Zerrakhi
  • Acantha
  • Tezrak
  • TextMason
  • Moonlightgirl
  • emily.ruth
  • Matt McCray
  • Coriander Dickinson
  • osoe